Share your favorite Oscar moment.
After 6 glasses of red wine and a dozen cocktail weanies, I tell a chick wearing a vintage beret and Rocket Dog shoes that astrology is BULLSHIT. She proceeds to try and guess my sign, which I remind her at one point..."you only have 4 more to go." I finally shriek, "for fuck's sakes! I'm a Capricorn!" Then I eat another weanie.
Guessing someone's sign is only "amazing" if you get it on the first or -maybe- second try.
When I was a kid I loved the show Green Acres. For those of you under a certain age, the show was about a successful lawyer (Oliver Wendel Douglas) who is sick of the rat race in the city and desires a simple country life. He has this dream of getting back to the land, being a farmer, living among the regular folks - being American. He drags his citified wife (Lisa Douglas) with him, and she has to go - because it is the 60's and she has no real say.
My favorite characters were Mr. Haney and The Monroe Brothers.
Mr. Haney was a shady sales man, he sold the property to Oliver and always seemed to be able to con him over and over again.
The Monroe Brothers were the carpenters often hired to fix things around the Douglas shack. Of course they never fixed anything and they were horrible carpenters. But the thing that I liked best was that one of the "brothers" was a girl.
Yesterday I thought about Ralph Monroe as I attempted to hang a wooden coat rack in our landing area.
I had gone down to the hardware store on 4th street and asked one of the older workers what I needed in the way of wall anchors. He showed me these HUGE plastic screw looking things and told me to hammer each one in to a certain point then - using a screw driver - to screw it into the wall until it was flush with the wall.
I can do that!
I arranged all my tools - stud finder, drill, screw driver, anchors, screws, level - on the floor and commenced.
First...the stud finder. I have never had luck with these things. I'm never sure what I am doing, but when it didn't beep when I ran it over the area I wanted to make holes, I figured I was stud free.
Second...the plastic anchor. I did exactly like the hardware guy said. Hammered it in then used the screw driver. But it only went in about halfway and the dry wall around it was pushing out toward me. I carefully unscrewed it and left behind a hole in the wall the size of a dime. I look in the hole and what do I see? A STUD!
I exclaimed, "SONOFABITCH!"
I didn't want that to happen again so I double checked where I was going to put the other screw for the coat rack and again the stud finder did not find a stud. I began putting in the next wall anchor and GUESS what? Reread the above paragraph and you will get the picture...
So I did what I probably shouldn't have done...I filled both holes with spackle and not wanting to wait a day for the gunk to dry, I used that drill I bought before Christmas and hung that stupid coat rack by screwing it directly into the studs that the stud finder didn't find.
On Green Acres everything Alf and Ralph Monroe fixed usually broke immediately after the repair. The coat rack has been hung for over 24 hours and is still in the wall.
So I used the Nioxin system (see post titled Bald Headed Woman) for thinning hair for the first time today. Because I was half asleep when I got in the shower I mistakenly put the conditioner on first...
Anyhoo. The shampoo doesn't make a great lather...which is sad because a thick lather usually means less hair in my hands when I massage my head. The conditioner is not a de-tangling conditioner, which again means more hair in my hands when I am massaging it through.
It is minty and it tingles. The conditioner is even more minty. Then there is the after shampoo scalp treatment, which is mildly minty.
The only thing I really noticed was that my hair had more body and some waves in it as it dried...which is really strange because my hair is straight as uncooked spaghetti noodles. So I have nothing to complain about in that department. These days I let my hair air dry unless I am going somewhere and need a "do". The less I yank and mess with it, the less it falls out.
So, as a shampoo, Nioxin made my hair fuller looking without teasing or spray or gel.
More as the story develops...
Bald headed woman to me...
I once heard the kid of a friend singing this with all the verve of the Bee Gees themselves. Of course the real words aren't "bald headed woman", but they sort of do sound like it...
I am losing my hair.
Not sure if it is hormonal or thyroid or stress or all that hair hopping I did in my Teens, 20's and 30's...all I know is I am seeing lots of scalp up top and I don't like it one bit.
I did the Rogaine thing for about 2 years and saw nothing but weird sprigs popping up at the crown - where I already have plenty of hair.
Today I bought Nioxin. It was recommended to me by a friend. Her daughter had some hair loss due to medication. I used to be on buttloads of medication and really started noticing my shiny scalp a few weeks after a surgery I had a several years ago. Not sure that it is related, but who knows?
So, I am going to document my experience with the Nioxin line of products.
http://www.nioxin.com/
More tomorrow after I wash/condition and treat my scalp.
My two sisters are in this photo. I always loved it and someday plan on making a painting using aspects of it.
Well, my 30 day stint with photoshop and indesign are about to end. I was so busy with the Indesign that I really didn't do much more with photoshop than this type of sophomoric goofing. Now that my job is done, I am so burned out on both of the programs that I don't even want to use up the remaining days of having them. But I am sure that a few days after they expire I will think of about 10 things I should have done while I had them.
And chuck that bottle into the gutter...or better yet...just cut out the middle man and lob it straight into the ocean. The future really is plastics, my boy...
Presenting...The Garbage Gyre!
Ok, so I thought that maybe my opinion would change about this newest form of Vox once I dorked around it for a month or so. Well it hasn't. I still feel that when I am skulking around I am looking for my car keys in a key factory. Too much busy work...
Who or what do you really love?
I love irony.
